Articles Tagged april fools wine

Robert Parker, Wine Advocate Apologize For “Boorish, Bullying” Behavior

Vinted on April 1, 2014 binned in Inebriated Press

Inebriated Press

In a stunning reversal of unwritten policy, the wine industry’s most powerful critic, Robert M. Parker, Jr.  and his fellow staff members at the publication he founded, The Wine Advocate, held a press conference earlier today to “apologize for our recent boorish, bullying behavior.”

“We at The Wine Advocate have, in short, been terribly, terribly wrong in our actions,” admitted Parker to a packed crowd of seven wine industry veterans gathered near his home in Monkton, Maryland. “My god, our behavior has been so infantile and vile that I don’t even know where to start, quite frankly. Oh, are those cookies over there? Could someone pass those?”

Parker began by extending a virtual vinous olive branch to Jon Bonne and Eric Asimov, wine writers for the San Francisco Chronicle and New York Times, respectively. Both men were publicly derided by Parker as unprofessional in a post in the online bulletin board of Parker’s website. “Really, that was totally uncalled for, and bitingly ironic considering that only a few days before I had, in their presence, publicly called for more civility among wine writers. I mean, dang, I’m making the whole profession look like a bunch of douchebags when I do things like that!” He then slammed his open right palm into his forehead, temporarily shaking the stage and causing microphone feedback that delayed the remainder of the press conference for several minutes. The normally recalcitrant Parker had been referring to statements he made as the keynote speaker at a wine writers conference, given only a short time before his remarks about Bonne and Asimov, both of whom were in the audience during Parker’s keynote address.

Parker was followed by several The Wine Advocate staff writers and critics in offering public apologies, including Master of Wine Lisa Perrotti-Brown, who referred to her mis-identification and lambasting of Bonne’s and Asimov’s “new California wines” session at the 2014 Professional Wine Writers Symposium in Napa, California (in which she mistakenly referred to wines that weren’t actually poured during the session) a “real fuck-up.” On the bulletin board, Perrotti-Brown called the wines “vaguely interesting,” “neutral,” “dilute,” and “flavorless, without vibrancy and texture, not unlike most of wine writing itself these days.”

“Well, what can I say, I just balled that up big time,” she told reporters and industry insiders…

Read the rest of this stuff »

22

 

 

Breaking News! Steve Heimoff And I To Swap Gigs!

Vinted on April 1, 2012 binned in wine news

In this special weekend edition of 1WineDude.com, I have some epically gargantuanly stunningly-hyphenated-made-up-adverbially BIG news to share with you all.

Steve Heimoff, of Wine Enthusiast Magazine (not sure if it’s the English or Mandarin version… but sh*t, I’d better find that out REAL soon) are SWAPPING GIGS.

Yes, ou’re reading that correctly. Steve Heimoff will now be writing the Wined Down With Joe Roberts column on Playboy.com, and I will be taking over Steve’s California wine beat for Wine Enthusiast.

As part of the move, Steve and I will also be swapping blogs, and so you will find Steve writing about writing about writing about wine here, and over at Steve’s website I will be penning my normal shot-from-the-hip missives about the wine world that actually sound like they were, indeed, shot by something and then left to rot.

I wanted you al to be the first to know. Only you’re not really the first to know… there were, like seventeen lawyers who knew before you did, and then there’s the editorial staff at WE and Playboy.com, and around eight or so of Steve’s neighbors in Oakland, who all knew before you did. But you’re, like, the thirty-fifth person to know and that’s meaningful to Steve and I, because I was 35 years maybe when Steve and I first met. Look, just go with it, okay?

I realize that this will come as a great shock to many of you, so it’s important that you understand the rationale behind this joint decision by Steve and me:

  • Talent: Steve and I are writers who can distinguish between when it is and is not grammatically correct to use the phrase “Steve and me.”
  • Work-Life Balance: We figured it would take a while before either WE or Playboy.com noticed, since we both like to work remotely.
  • Because We Can: We’re both, like, super-important in the wine blog world and this is, in fact, a childish attempt by both of us to lord our power over the minions.
  • Intangibles: We’re about the same height.
  • For The Good of the Land: Steve is less dangerous for the Playboy Playmates, and I’m less dangerous for Wine Enthusiast.

See you over at SteveHeimoff.com, people!

Cheers – and check your calendars!

p.s. – Mad, mad love, respect & appreciation to Steve, who had no idea I was doing this but I strongly suspect will take it with good humor (what’s Mandarin for “humor”?).

17

 

 

The Fine Print

This site is licensed under Creative Commons. Content may be used for non-commercial use only; no modifications allowed; attribution required in the form of a statement "originally published by 1WineDude" with a link back to the original posting.

Play nice! Code of Ethics and Privacy.

Contact: joe (at) 1winedude (dot) com

Google+

Labels

Vintage

Find

Sign up, lushes!

Enter your email address to subscribe and get all the good stuff via email.

Join 40,254 other subscribers

Gravityscan Badge